Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Fast Cars

Look at the below cars. If Dr. Crazy were to have a date next week (and yes, this may be true), and if each of the below cars signifies a kind of suitor, with which do you think Dr. Crazy would be most likely to be planning to have dinner?




The image “http://www.lakeycars.co.uk/images/porsche911_1.JPG” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.


Jonathan said...

If the second one represents a skilled tradesmen (a functional truck belonging to a contractor, plumber, or the like), you should go out with him. If the third belongs to Burt Reynolds or someone as funny as him, that'd be something to consider. I see no personality distinction between #1 and #4. You should add a Volvo and link to the Stanley Fish essay, which was complete bullshit by the way. (I drive a Corolla.)

Dr. Crazy said...

You're right, I probably should have included something volvo-like and did consider it, but then I figured that all that would say is that the guy is married :)

At any rate, I disagree that 1 and 4 are the same - one is clearly more "international man of mystery" and one is clearly more "playful cad making up for small penis with sportscar."

I, too, drive a corolla.

Second Line said...

Given that you're a blues fan, I'm surprised you ain't got no Cadillac, or maybe a V-8 Ford. Although I'd be hot for you if you had a Terraplane on there. (points if you get this last reference)

These, as you know, are the only suitable cars for a bluesman to drive.

Flavia said...

I have absolutely no doubt that it's number three.

But then, I don't really *know* you know you, so perhaps I'm wrong.

Juno Walker said...

My guess would be #1 - it speaks of sophistication and affluence without compensation for certain anatomical shortcomings.

Would you consider a tall dog trainer who doesn't own a car? *wink*wink*

I do own a Shepherd, however. But that's not a car :)


Dr. Crazy said...

You are right about all of the appropriate bluesman vehicles, SL - sadly, no bluesmen are currently in the running. If there were, they would of course catch a Robert Johnson reference :)

A shepherd is not a car, it's true, but a shepherd will love you while a car will not, so the shepherd does have merits with which a hunk of steel could not compete. That said, no puppy will take you on a weekend road trip - or no puppy I've ever had. As for your guess at #1, the problem is that #1 is an international man of mystery and thus not local. #1 is that which we dream of and that which is ever inches beyond our grasp. But I did just get off the phone with #3. Flavia, you know me better than you think :)

kfluff said...

#3 is soooo Dazed and Confused! Is he a Matthew McConaughey? Does he have a mullet? Does he paddle freshman for fun?

Juno Walker said...

#3??? Does he have a mullet and a moustache?

hee hee


Dr. Crazy said...

Hehe! No, he doesn't have a mullet and a mustache, though you would think he would, wouldn't you? He is also (sadly) not Matthew McConaughey. I'll ask him about the paddling of freshmen after I get to know him a bit better :)

Trans Am's a banker, and he looks exactly as you'd expect a banker-ish yuppie to look. (And yes, he's going to be known as Trans Am from this point forward.)

But I've got to say, in 2007, guys with bitchin' Trans Ams just don't come along every day, so I feel like I've got to at least go out with the guy once. I mean, I missed the whole Trans Am craze of the 70s and 80s, being in preschool and elementary school. When will I have this kind of opportunity again????

Flavia said...

All I can say is, when I scrolled through the images earlier today, I laughed out loud the second I saw the Trans Am, and I KNEW.

I think I'd have known even if I hadn't (however briefly) met you in person. You know how I knew? I knew because of your story of your long-ago, Dukes of Hazzard-esque adventures.

History Geek said...

Dr. C, did my comment get through? I swear I left one about the last car looking like James Bond should be driving it.

Doctor Pion said...

Not to insult that Jag, which is a fantastic car, but you do remember what the International Man of Mystery had in his suitcase? He was the one doing the compensating! The Porsche is much more likely to be raced (i.e. used for its intended purpose) than that Jag.

However, I like the image of a banker who drives an old Trans Am ... particularly if it actually has the hood "bird". Seems perfectly quirky for Dr. Crazy!

New Kid on the Hallway said...

Heh, I thought the Trans Am too.

Why am I commenting as if I don't have to get up and work tomorrow???