So, I've been feeling a bit at loose ends with work stuff, and all of that came to a head yesterday with my minor meltdown PMS feeling of freakishness and doom. You know, the problem is that I can really handle things much more efficiently and with much less drama when I'm really busy - and part of that is because I then become very committed to scheduling myself. Part of my problem over the past couple of weeks is that I've been very unscheduled, and - much like little children who don't have regular nap and bedtimes - I get fussy when I don't have a routine. I also start feeling all angsty and inadequate and incompetent and stuff.
(Note: this was something I felt periodically during graduate school and felt most of all during the dissertation-writing phase of things when I had a fellowship and wasn't teaching; I had not yet learned that I had to be very regimented in order to actually be happily without a schedule that was imposed upon me.)
But so anyway, I've not been scheduling myself adequately since the semester ended. At first that was good because I needed some down time. But the end result is that I've been Ms. Cranky Pants much more than I'd like over the past week or so.
But so anyway, yesterday I committed to making a list of things to do, and can I just say that this list only ultimately took me 1 hour and 15 minutes to complete? Sure, it was a list of piddly odds and ends, but I had built them up in my head to be this colossal mountain of odds and ends that I could never complete. So I'm feeling much less cranky and fussy and well, lte's just say it, crazy today than I've been feeling. This is a good thing. And I'm beginning to get psyched about my upcoming conference, and I'm also psyched to hang with BFF this afternoon/evening. Speaking of which, I'm famished. I believe I shall call BFF and see what she thinks about hanging out right now.
5 years ago