Friday, October 17, 2008

In Which the Kittens Address My Readers (For Don't We All Love Some Friday Cat Blogging?)

Man-Kitty: Hello, and good day to you. It is I,the Man-Kitty. I write --

Mr. Stripey: And me too! Mr. Stripey here! At your service! Hello! Good morning!

Man-Kitty: Hmmpf. As I was saying, I write this post knowing that you must all have been starved for news about how the Cats of Crazy are doing in this very busy autumn season. As you might imagine, there are a good many things keeping us busy. For example --

Mr. Stripey: My favorite place to play is in the bathtub! I bring my toys in there! It's awesome!

Man-Kitty: Sigh. For example, we have a daily schedule that begins around 6 AM when I, the more responsible of the two of us, make it my business to awaken Crazy using a variety of well-proven tactics. Then, we breakfast, and spend approximately one hour running about the house and wrestling. Exercise is a very important part of a healthy cat's daily routine. When this is done, it is time for our first baths of the day. While we take care of most of our bathing independently, it is awfully nice to have each other for bathing those difficult to reach spots, like our ears, necks, and eyeballs. See for example this photograph of Mr. Stripey cleaning my face, which was taken about a month or two ago. He, while excitable, does do quite an exemplary job now that he is trained. Indeed, though this may be too much information, he recently had his first hairball and it was the color of my hair! What a good young apprentice!

Mr. Stripey: Hairballs are very disgusting. Even I cannot be excited about those. But it's nice to help out by bathing my brother! Yay! I'm useful! And very affectionate!

Man-Kitty: Once our bath is done, we retire for our morning naps. I enjoy privacy while napping, and so recently have taken to napping within the Tent of Kittens. In it, I look very kittenish if I do say so myself. Indeed, I look positively tiny, and very, very sweet.

Man-Kitty: My brother, on the other hand, is growing by leaps and bounds. His stripes become more and more pronounced with each passing day, and he increases in size in ways that are somewhat disturbing. Soon, I fear, he shall become larger than I, for while I appear quite majestic to the naked eye, a lot of that is just my glorious fur coat. See for example, Mr. Stripey on the top perch of the condo, which I rarely, if ever, get to inhabit since the arrival of Mr. Stripey.

Mr. Stripey: I am SO not big! I am LITTLE! And CUTE! And STRIPEY!

Man-Kitty: I never said that you weren't stripey. In fact, I said quite the opposite. You must pay attention. However, I believe if we look at the evidence, we can all agree that you are getting much bigger. Indeed, you are positively cat-sized. You cannot deny it.

Mr. Stripey: But inside I am wee! I am still the baby! You are not the baby! I am Mr. Stripey, the baby of the family! I dispute your claims to kittenishness! Dispute them, I say!

Man-Kitty: Go to sleep. You appear to be over-tired.

Mr. Stripey: You're just saying that because you want to go to sleep! ... But I am feeling very sleepy....

Man-Kitty: Yes, I know, Mr. Stripey. Come, we both need our rest if we are to wrestle as scheduled in three hours time.


Virginia S. Wood, PsyD said...

You had mentioned on your old blog that you would not wish to hire a professor who put her kitties on her blog. What a stuffy old institution you must work for! I would vote for you in a skinny minute (and for tenure, too). BECAUSE of the cats, not in spite of them.

I loved this story, not least of all because Mr. Stripey reminds me of my old dog, the last of her pack. My husband noted in her early years that she was making a career out of being the baby of the family, and indeed, she maintained her puppyhood right up until the last month or so of her life.

If she were here now, she would highly recommend that course to you, too, Mr. Stripey.

Dr. Crazy said...

I'm glad you enjoyed the post, Virginia :) I still wouldn't want to do this sort of thing on my professional site, not so much because my colleagues would look askance (in fact, they'd probably love it), but because most of the people who go to my website are a) people who don't know me and b) prospective students. The kitties would be a distraction at best and would take away from what little authority I possess at worst (with students who don't know me.... once they get to know me they hear of the kitties).

Sisyphus said...

Kitties! Cute! Those little troublemakers! Ew about the hairball though.

PS please tell your cats that mine are doing quite well with troublemaking on their own and do not require any more help.

k8 said...

So cute! This sort of post just pushes me one step closer to kitty adoption.