As I went to title this post, I realized I'd used the exact same title for last year. Apparently, I decide to write about my birthday on the Eve of it, and apparently, I find the same titles compelling year after year. It's a wonder you people continue to read! And yet you do, and this is wonderful, if I do say so myself. But so at any rate, it's as good a time as any for some (more) self-reflection, this time of the non-blog-related variety.
So, how are things? If I do say so myself, I think they're quite good. I'm feeling kind of quiet as this, my 34th, birthday rolls around. I have no big plans for celebration, and while my friends near and far seem to wonder at whether this is a good thing, seriously, after the summer I've had, I'm sort of excited to have nothing going on. Between teaching and the article and the book and the visitors and the new kitten and the travels... well, I've had a hella-busy summer, and I'm feeling sort of exhausted by it all. In other words, looking forward to doing absolutely NOTHING in the coming days is actually sort of fantastic. Of course, I can't really do absolutely nothing. I've got an online course to slap together, along with emails to catch up on (I'm making slow progress), and who knows what else. But really, I have no agenda for tomorrow or for the weekend, and that's lovely.
Looking back over my journal from the last year and a half or so, which I plan to finish up with tonight/tomorrow so as to begin a new journal which was a birthday present to myself - and which actually looks quite lovely with a totally unexpected birthday present from FL that I received yesterday, a lovely Montblanc pen that is black on the base and the cap but orange in the middle - and looking at my navel-gazing on the blog from about a year ago, I feel like I'm making some progress.
The greater ease I was feeling last year about the job has only increased, and I really do feel like it's cool if I end up here forever. Of course, the "smart" thing to do would be to go on the market this year.... I guess. FB and I were talking about this, and I know that he's sort of right, but I also feel like I have no interest in going on the market because it's the "smart" thing to do. I'm not going to make substantially more money than I'm making now even if the Richest University in the World were to hire me (the salary range in English just isn't that big), and the thought of starting over someplace else... well, I'm not so into that. The thing about my current gig is I do feel settled and comfortable and, well, empowered. So while I've considered sending out applications this fall, I kind of am not terribly enthusiastic about it and I wonder whether I'd really like to expend my energy on doing so. Whatever the case, I'm definitely not going to MLA, which makes sending things out sort of pointless for many jobs, I'd imagine. Why am I definitely not going to MLA when I love it so, you ask? Well, because I'm committed to being at the next three after this one, and even the MLA-loving me needs a freaking break. I cannot imagine not taking this year off. So there we are.
Personally, in terms of the romance business, well, things sort of are in a comfortable if not ideal place as well. Sure, there are things that I'd "want" or whatever, but I'm not feeling all angsty about anything. Nah, things are what they are on that score, and that's just fine with me.
Personally, in terms of just my own personal situation, like finances, I'm making great headway on debt, the book will come out - with a lovely blurb on the back - and yep, things are good there, too.
I suppose, although it's almost cheesy to write, I feel as if I've got a lot to be thankful for on this birthday eve. A good life, good friends, good wine (for a change), and a good plan for going forward. I don't feel so much like I'm chasing my tail, although a certain wee Mr. Stripey is currently doing just that :)
Actually, speaking of Mr. Stripey, FB has admonished me that this blog template needs an update because "you have two cats now," and apparently, it is a grievous offense that I am not showcasing the one that he prefers in this here space. I explained to him that I didn't even do this template, so the likelihood of my changing it was quite small indeed, and so if it was such a problem for him then he would need to do it for me. As I explained to him, changing it would involve a complete overhaul, because the current stripey template wouldn't go if Mr. Stripey, with his non-orange stripes, were in the header. FB may or may not be taking on this task, especially since he didn't seem to enjoy my insistence that I wouldn't use whatever he did if I didn't like it.
Until that day comes when the template changes, however, perhaps you would enjoy a picture of Mr. Stripey. Here he is, stretched out to his full stripey-ness. You can also see how it looks like he's a kitten wearing a kitten-suit, with a zipper.
5 years ago