Anyway. That's not what I feel like writing about right now, though. What I feel like writing about is my inability to understand how anyone could possibly think that a person who is angry at them will become less angry if one ignores them and pretends that they don't exist. I mean, I get it if the person doesn't like the idea of dealing with the angry person, but to characterize checking out as being about taking care of the angry person and of the relationship just strikes me as totally disingenuous. Going and pouting in a corner isn't some positive course of action in my book, however one tries to spin it.
But I'm not going to write more about that because really, what is there to say?
In other news, I've been rereading Jeanette Winterson's The Powerbook. Let's end with a passage from her that captures how I feel in less rage-filled moments:
"I said I was afraid of not living.
I don't want to eke out my life like a resource in short supply. The only selfish life is a timid one. To hold back, to withdraw, to keep the best in reserve, both overvalues the self, and undervalues what the self is.
Here is my life - I have to mine it, farm it, trade it, tenant it, and when the lease is up it cannot be renewed.
This is my chance. Take it." (203)
3 comments:
hmm if I ignore it, she'll get over it eventually and it will all just go away..? maybe? I don't know. I'm tempted to add...because she's being a bit hysterical but I won't. Except I just did.
Oh, I am being a bit hysterical. The thing is, I'm not likely to get *less* hysterical when I'm being ignored. I'm a person who throws tantrums, which he knows. People who throw tantrums aren't likely to get LESS upset when you ignore them.
So sure, I'm hysterical. But it's not like he doesn't KNOW I'm a hysterical person. It's not like this is NEW.
Call me sexist, but I think it's a guy thing. My ex used to literally think that if he ignored me, he wasn't "reinforcing" my anger. WTF?
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