1) I have found 6 positions that are a possibility.
2) Of those six positions, I am fairly certain that I have an actual shot at perhaps four of them.
3) The reality is that probably I think too highly of myself, and I really only have an actual shot at approximately two of the six.
4) Even still, the likelihood is that I can really only reasonably expect an interview at maybe (perhaps) one place.
5) And I've got to remember not to fret should even that one interview not come through, as the job market in my field is not wide open, and I know at least one person (but really more like 25 people) with whom I will be competing for these six jobs. And they're all really, really smart, and I need to remember that, too. Not that I'm not smart as well, but it is important to give props to one's competitors so as not to be too full of oneself and to come crashing down when one's bubble bursts and one has to face the reality of one's own position.
6) And so why go through all of this? Because I've got to know. I've got to know whether I can do it or not. And if not? Well, what the hell. You've got to put yourself out there in order to do anything, right?
So now it begins in earnest. The obsessive compiling of the materials, the checking once and then twice to make sure everything is right, and the obsessing over paper and envelopes and things. Oh, and maybe buying a new laptop because there was a tragic accident last night involving one idiotic (although lovable, but I'm mad at him) feline (who weighs more than my colleague's 2-month-old baby, incidentally), a glass of wine, and some very ill-advised attempts to mop up the keyboard without having turned off the computer. Of course, I do hope that maybe the computer fixed itself while I wasn't looking, but I'm not entirely hopeful, especially as this laptop is from like 1998, it weighs like 45 lbs., it's kind of stolen property, and it never worked very well to begin with. But I wrote my dissertation on it, and it has sentimental value, dammit! Oh well, I guess I'll find out.
But I digress. I really need to get back to obsessing about the six (or really 1 or 2) potential futures that I might have in various locations across these great United States (2 in the South, 2 East, 1 West, 1 Upper (and I mean Upper) Midwest). We shall see!
1 year ago