So I've been trying to work on the monstrosity that is my sabbatical application for the past week or so. I need to finish it in order to then cannibalize it for 3 other applications for smaller institutional awards, and then refine it for some other external support. What is very difficult and annoying about putting all of this together is that I don't feel like I've really had the time to think deeply about my project, so it feels premature to try to pin it down, as such applications make one do. Problematically, I will never have time to think deeply about my project if I don't pin it down which requires deep thinking. You see why this is frustrating.
Also frustrating is hitting that sweet spot somewhere in between sycophancy and authority, while retaining a certain scholarly joie de vivre and at the same time using institutional buzz words like "talent imperative" and "community outreach" and "student-centered," whether they apply to one's topic or not.
And more frustrating than all of this is that I can't keep thinking about it (or even blogging about it) because I have to go revolutionize general education for the next two hours. I am *cranky.*
1 year ago